Well, in keeping with today’s theme of  meanspiritedly mocking successful sports commentators, I wanted to pass along a link to a video of Mike Francesa going batshit after a caller disagrees with his assertion that Joba Chamberlain be moved to the bullpen immediately. I believe Bo and I have previously referenced our long time fondness for listening to Mike and the Maddog. It was always a very unique experience, in that they managed to constantly infuriate you while also keeping you entertained at the same time. I haven’t gotten a chance to listen to Mike’s show much since he’s gone solo (due mainly to my current geographic circumstances), but I happened upon this video while looking at SI.com’s Extra Mustard page, and it reminded me of why I simultaneously love and hate the show so much.

(By the way, all you youngsters out there who dream about one day hosting a sports radio show, pay close attention. Mike puts on a clinic of classic Francesa-style debate: caller makes a point that goes against one of his assertions, then he yells over said caller until finally cutting off the call, then once the person’s gone, he completely misrepresents the argument that was made and derisively mocks it with no dissenting voice left to fight back. It’s one of his favorite tricks, and all WFAN listeners know it quite well.)

Francesa Video

First of all, let’s just look at what the caller actually said. He claimed that Joba’s ERA since became a starter is among the best 5 or 6 in baseball over that period. Now, let’s ignore the fact that ERA is a flawed and overrated stat, and figure out how accurate this claim is.

Joba pitched 65.1 innings last year and allowed 20 earned runs (an ERA of 2.76), and to this point in 2009, he’s pitched 45.1 innings while again allowing exactly 20 earned runs (an ERA of 3.97). So when you add that together, it’s 110.2 innings and 40 earned runs, which by my math, comes out to an ERA of 3.26. Certainly, that’s a very good number which probably invalidates Francesa’s indignation all by itself, but I’m not quite sure I believe that would put him in the top 5 in all of baseball, maybe top 5 in the AL. I don’t know of a simple way to look that up though, and I’m too lazy to spend more than 5 minutes figuring one out, so I’m going to have to classify it as believable with a slight touch of exaggeration.

Mike, of course, tells the guy he’s out of his mind, and mutates the point to insinuate that he’s claiming Joba’s one of the five best pitchers in baseball. My favorite part, though, is when confronted with the valid point that he has way more patience with Hughes (who’s been far, far worse than Joba), Mike exclaims, “Hughes is a STARTER! He’s a STARTER!.” What the fuck does that even mean? Joba spent two half seasons in the bullpen so now he’s a reliever forever? Is it like how James Gandolfini can’t really play other roles because he’s been typecast as Tony Soprano? Is David Price no longer a starter? I mean this is just psychobabble. Seriously, insinuating Phil Hughes is a “true starter” and therefore deserving of more patience than Joba because he hasn’t yet been stripped of his relief pitching virginity is just insane.

He, then, goes completely ballistic at the mention of Andy Pettite. I watched this part of the video at least 10 times because it’s strangely entrancing in the same way as pulling on a cat’s tail to piss it off (that’s my bad analogy of the day, sponsered by Rick Reilly). Anyway, there really are no words that can add to the experience of watching that portion of the video, so instead, I want to turn to the actual argument at the heart of this clip: whether Joba should be a starter or a reliever.

Because here’s the thing about this argument a lot of people seem to forget: it shouldn’t be a real argument. To put it simply, any above average starter is more valuable to a team than a dominant closer. I realize that having a bad bullpen can be one of the most frustrating parts of rooting for a baseball team, but you have to step back and gain some perspective. Last year, Bo and all Mets fans experienced about as frustrating a year from a bullpen as I’ve ever seen, and instead of overreacting this offseason and moving like Pelfrey or Maine or someone back there, they acquired 2 big name closers without surrendering any top prospects or giving out a terrible contract. And I’m not saying that to pat Omar Minaya on the back or anything, because I think just about any rational GM would’ve done something similar. Building a bullpen is kind of a tricky science, but it’s not nearly as costly or difficult as building a rotation. Finding quality starters is like digging for gold, while finding relievers is more like throwing shit against a wall to see what sticks. It really should put things into perspective that K-Rod, coming off a record breaking year as a closer, got 3 years and $37 million. Oliver freakin’ Perez got 3 and 36 from the same team, so what does that tell you about the value of closers versus the value of starters? If you can be an effective starter, then you should be starting. This is completely logical when you simply consider the amount of innings each will pitch over the course of the year and the overall impact each will have on a team’s win total, and that logic is backed up by the current pay scales for each spot.  Well,  Joba Chamberlain has the potential to be an ace, so let’s make him a goddamn setup man! 

I also need to point out that the vast majority of relief pitchers are either failed starters, or guys who were short relievers from the minute they got signed or drafted. It’s not as if there’s a ton of guys pitching at the end of bullpens who would work well as starting pitchers. I know there are exceptions (Papelbon most notably, maybe a guy like Soria, Smoltz for a few years, etc.), but for the most part, that’s the way it is. Mike’s beloved Mariano, the man he’d like Joba to eventually replace, is essentially a one pitch pitcher. He couldn’t be a starter, he tried that at the start of his career and failed. Joba, on the other hand, has 4 plus pitches when he’s going right. That assortment belongs at the top of a rotation, not the back of the bullpen. David Price was Tampa’s most dominant reliever during last year’s postseason, and their bullpen happens to suck this year, so by Francesa’s logic shouldn’t the Rays be converting him back to a closer immediately? Well, of course, they’re not doing that, nor would they even consider it, because it doesn’t make any fucking sense.

I get that having Joba in the 8th makes for a very comfortable security blanket, but the one thing that Mike, and all Yankee fans who feel the same way, are losing sight of is that that’s because he’s really fucking good at pitching. You don’t clamor for Hughes, or Pettite, or Kennedy back there, because they might suck at it. It has nothing to do with them being true starters or some bullshit like that. It’s classic Yankee fan greed. They know Joba has the talent to dominate in short relief right now, and so they want to pigeon hole him there forever without considering the fact that he may become just as dominant if given the time to mature as a starting pitcher (and by the way, a 3.97 ERA with more than a strikeout per inning isn’t anything to scoff at). Not to keep bringing up Price, but we know he has the stuff to dominate out of the bullpen, and yet he struggled to some degree in AAA this season. That’s anecdotal I know, but my point is that it just takes time to learn how to pitch as a starter. It takes more than sheer stuff, and the idea that because someone has good enough stuff to dominate in short relief before they’ve fully developed as a pitcher, they should just be closers forever is so dumb that it makes me want to pull a Francesa and start yelling uncontrollably until I turn hot pink.

The only reason to put Joba in the bullpen would be health concerns. If for some reason, over the course of the next few years, he proves unable to stay healthy as a starter, then the bullpen could become an attractive backup plan. For now though, shut the fuck up and let people who know what they’re doing make the crucial decisions on how to handle the most valuable assets of the team, not a guy who wanted to trade Hughes and Cano for Nate McLouth.